In remembrance of Juniper.

IMG_20150405_085331In celebration of a tiny life. Juniper would have been a year today.

“My soul follows close behind You; Your right hand upholds me.” (Psalm 63:8)

I slipped out of the office to take a short walk on my lunch hour and stretch my cramped muscles. I had been hunched over a glaring computer all morning, writing articles for the weekly newspaper in my town. But I didn’t appreciate the warm spring day mocking my mood.

My sweet baby … gone.

Walking in a small neighborhood of family homes, I passed a tiny yard with daffodils bursting thought their green jackets. Pale green leaves struggled to see the light of day. Next to a concrete walkway a little nylon banner hanging from a black metal frame proclaimed, “Life is good.”

Liar.
God, would you forgive me if I kicked that stupid flag? Right now life isn’t looking good.

My granddaughter, a tiny 5-month old just went to heaven. So fast… just like that. Poof.

Only two weeks ago we celebrated her first Easter. She was passed like a precious, delicate treasure amongst the family. A pale little face with bright eyes who looked intently into whoever was holding her. She had a wide mouth and a lower lip that sprouted out into spontaneous smiles for anyone who held her. A week later she died of SIDS.

A snap of the fingers, she was gone- and all that joy with her.
All the plans parents and grandparents make… never to be.
No first tooth, first words, first steps.
No first day at school
No graduation.
No being in her sister’s wedding.
Delete, Delete, Delete.

What a short whisper of a life.

In my heartbreak the Lord took my arm and continued walking with me.
Thank you Lord, I needed a companion today.
I took some more steps, continuing to walk out my sorrow. I know He grieves with me for my loss. Please Lord, continue to be real to me as I trudge this rock path of sorrow.
As I turned back to head to my office, I heard the Lord whisper, “Life isn’t always good, but I am good.”
Thank you Lord. Let my soul follow behind You.

2 responses to “In remembrance of Juniper.”

  1. Very touching Carol – prayer for you and your family…

    1. We appreciate the prayers as the anniversary is coming up.

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